but....then im home.
and i miss you. and its quiet. and i cant sleep.
and i feel profoundly lonely.
but ill live.
still.
its all so amazing until you feel what youre really feeling.
these things, these rare, happy, fleeting moments all seem to have wishes and "if only"s attached to them.
in the back of my mind, it never stops.
so even drunk laughter sounds tinged with sadness.
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