ish.

i didnt work out today.

im so tired my eyes want to close, and im drinking, even though my stomach cant take it.

but my mind's whirring around despite it all. and all i care about is how puffy my face feels.

its feels fat. everything feels soft. my legs propped on this chair are driving me nuts because i still hate things touching. ugh. sick. i need to run.

they dont hurt enough from yesterday.

running six miles at 8:30 half drunk isn't normal.

but i think i have to do it or ill go crazy.

and im not doing anything, no one's here, no one's answering the phone.

so why not, right?

it's productive. ish.